REAL Circle of Mothers

Radical Empathy, Authentic Listening

What is the REAL Circle of Mothers?

It's a group where we can talk about life as a mother - the highs, the lows and everything in between. We drink a cuppa, eat traybake and hold space for each other to talk about whatever is on our mind or in our heart. It's a non-judgemental, supportive atmosphere where all mothers are included, accepted and heard. 

The Circle is consent based - you only need to share if you feel like it, and only share what you want to. We also encourage you to consider having the courage to be a little vulnerable if you feel able, as you may get more from the circle that way, but we understand it's a personal choice and we are happy for you to find the balance of comfort and courage that feels right for you.

You will be a part of a Circle of mothers who hold space for each other, respect each other and raise each other up. Mothers raising children, mothers raising each other. We aren't meant to do this on our own.

Who is it for?

It is for anyone who identifies as a mother, and you can come with or without children of any age. You might be pregnant, brand new to mothering or you might have been mothering for many years! Most mums who come are fairly local (within 20 mins drive), but some live further afield and travel up to an hour to get here. So as long as you want to be here, you're welcome!

When is it?

10am-12pm, alternating between Tuesdays and Fridays, once every 10-11 days (3 weekly on a Tuesday and 3 weekly on a Friday). You can find the available dates on the booking form.

You can pick and choose which Circles to come to. It's great if it works for you occasionally, and it's also lovely to see mums again and again and build the sense of community!

Where is it?

REAL Circles are held in The Log Cabin in my garden in Soham. Click here to find out more about the venue. 

How much is each ticket for the Circle?

Tickets are £10 per person. Often, that £10 comes from the person booking but, if finances are a barrier, you can pay whatever feels comfortable (from zero pounds upwards!) and the rest of the ticket cost can come from the Random Act Of Kindness (RAOK) fund.

Equally, if you'd be happy to pay a bit more than £10 to reflect your fortunate circumstances, you would be helping another mother to be able to attend at a price that is right for them - your Random Act Of Kindness for the day! See the Random Act Of Kindness page for more details about the RAOK fund.

How do I book and pay?

Fill out the booking form here to book for as many Circles as you like (you can pick and choose dates). You can pay by bank transfer or debit card, but if you need an alternative payment method, just ask. Details are in the booking form. 

What happens in the Circle?

After arriving and settling in with a cuppa, there are four parts of the Circle:

During the whole thing we drink a cuppa or three, eat traybake, look after our children, nip to loo anytime and generally keep ourselves comfortable!

There are sometimes a few tears when sharing about something that feels hard, as it's a safe space where you can do that, there's always loads of solidarity and plenty of laughter as we all just 'get it'!

You can ask the group any questions that are on your mind, knowing that no-one will judge you or tell you what to do, because I make it clear that you know your family best. Instead of advice, you'll hear stories, experiences and information from myself and other mothers. You don't have to have a question to come along, it's all about having the opportunity to connect with others and be part of a group. 

How do I focus on the Circle whilst looking after my little one?

We try our best to meet our own needs and our children's needs and that is good enough! Most of us (including me!) will be mothering at the same time, so we know we won't have undivided attention and that's ok. 

We all find different ways to make it work for us and our little ones, whether that's snacks or toys or whatever might entertain them. It's really healthy for us to find a way to meet our own need for connection, it keeps us on an even kilter and helps us to be the mother we want to be. It's also really heartwarming to be around other mothers looking after their little ones and to see the little ones playing with or near each other. There have been several occasions where one mum will help entertain another mum's child whilst that mum is speaking. This is a mini version of 'the village'!

How many people will be there?

There are a maximum of eight spaces available for each Circle, but the number attending varies Circle to Circle. A minimum of three attendees is required in order for the Circle to run.

What if I need to cancel my place?

Places are limited, so if you need to cancel, I would appreciate you letting me know as soon as circumstances change, so that I can offer your space to someone else.

Is there an online version?

We have a WhatsApp group for anyone who has attended the REAL Circle of Mothers which you can join once you've been to the circle, so you can carry on connecting with and benefiting from the wealth of experiences within the group in between circles.

We started out on Zoom back in Jan 2021, but I don't currently run any Zoom Circles. This is something I would consider doing if there was enough interest, so if you're interested, please let me know.